I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
