i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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