I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
