I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
