It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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