Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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