Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
