He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
