Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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