I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize
