I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
