The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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