Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
