On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
