Jerry, you need to find god
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
