y did u give ur computer a hand job?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
