JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
