I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
