we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
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