She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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