We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
