Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
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