At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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