She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
