THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
