Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
