that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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