Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
We had sex on a dog bed..
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
