Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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