just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
