I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
