dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
