I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Let the clothes fall where they may.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
