I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
