just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
