it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize