i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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