Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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