watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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