I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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