just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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