Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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