If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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