Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
