but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
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