I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
We got so high we made milksteak
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
And the cops told us we were all naked.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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