Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
