Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
