I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
