well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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