I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
do herpes really smell.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
