The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
